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Showing posts from October, 2008

CUT

Patricia McCormick’s “Cut” was a young adult novel I chose based on a recommendation from my younger sister.   She said that it changed her life.   After reading it, I was saddened to have to correlate its self-harming subject matter with my lil sis… In the novel, Callie is a self-destructive girl who cuts herself.   Never enough to kill herself, but just enough to feel the pain of being alive.   I have never personally cut before, so I’m not sure what it feels like.   However, after researching some on the web, I have discovered that it can be associated with relief, a way for the emotional pain to escape through physical means.   Callie is unresponsive to the steps her parents take to get her to express her feelings, and withdrawls herself completely from her friends, peers and family.   Engaging in the only activitiy that allows her to “breath,” she realizes she has a problem when the sight of shiny sharp objects gives her happiness. Written in the first person as though

Barf!

http://www.lyrics.com/index.php/artists/lyric/theory-of-a-deadman-lyrics-bad-girlfriendt-13949663

The Boyfriend List: girl code exposed

The book I read is a few years old and is written for young girls. I actually bought it at the dollar tree which surprised me after reading it because it was really good. It’s called “The Boyfriend List” and the author is E. Lockhart. I tried googling her and there was pretty much nothing besides her blog and her website. Her bio on her website gave me no information about her background and she really didn’t give any personal info besides her first name which is Emily. I was sure after reading this book again and noticing all the stuff about vegetarianism and feminism that she’d be some sort of activist. The book was about this girl named Ruby and the list of boyfriends (official or not) that she’s ever had; which was an assignment from her therapist. It’s a cute way to write a book and I really enjoyed the sequencing and style. The most annoying thing in the book is that her nickname is Roo which for some reason really repulsed me. Ruby’s life was probably like most girls, growing up

Girls Out Late by Jacqueline Wilson

Girls Out Late The three main characters, Nadine, Magda, and Ellie vary in size, style, and attitude. Ellie, who nararates the story, talks about her insecurities about her weight and popularity. No matter how fat she feels in her pants, or too-tight sweaters, she still acts confident when in her friends’ presence. They lift her up, and always stand by her. Ellie has a neat Stepmother, little brother, and a Dad who tries very hard to stay firm, while still letting her figure things out on her own. Her Dad encourages her to draw, date (14 yrs old), or do whatever else makes me happy. Magda differs from Ellie in almost every way. She is gorgeous, loves boys, and wants to spend all of her free time shopping. Nadine wear all black, loves to listen to underground bands, and had an abusive boyfriend in the past. During the story, the girls deal with many issues with the opposite sex. Ellie has her first boyfriend, Russell. Nadine struggles to distance herself from her ex-boyfriend. Magda get

I didn't blog on time cuz I got dumped

I am not going to blog about a movie because although I watched Ghost World and Now and Then for this assignment, I could not muster up enough emotional energy to blog about someone else’s life (or even blog on time). So I've decided to blog about my own life. I think this is relevant because I am a girl and a feminist and this is real. On Sunday I got dumped. We dated for three and a half years and I was madly in love with him. I thought he loved me too, but apparently not anymore. Problems between us started mostly when I came into feminism. I became strong and loud and opinionated. I had views that started differing from his on everything from Iraq to Family Guy to hairstyles. I wanted him to take Intro to Women’s Studies and he didn’t want to. I wanted him to participate with CodePink and he didn’t want to. I wanted him to understand why John McCain is bad for women’s health and well being, and he didn’t want to. I know feminism changed my life, but I guess I didn’t

I want traveling pants

I haven't seen most of the movies that were on our list but I got the impression that most of them portrayed the negative side of girlhood and adolescence. Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants has the ability to dip into the negativity (death, single parenting, lost love, losing virginity, parents' divorce), however, it's still a feel-good movie. I think that's ultimately because it focuses so much on this friendship between four girls - a friendship that's so strong that nothing will break them apart. I think a strong, healthy relationship is probably the best thing a girl can ask for (as long as it doesn't delve into the "toxic friendship"). I imagine this is one reason why middle school and high school can be so difficult for girls: because they're so busy trying to impress everyone and make friends. For example, in 10th grade I had one really good friend that I ate lunch with every day. On the days she was absent, I was embarrassed to eat alone a

Teen Breaks

I saw a link to this site on Feministing and thought that it was relevant to our ongoing and upcoming discussions about girls' sexuality. The website deals with girls' sexuality and encourages abstinence and condemns abortion. I find the site absolutely horrifying, full of misinformation and sexism. I was curious as to what you all would have to say about it. http://www.teenbreaks.com/

Living in a Ghost World

  I just recently watched  Ghost World, and   I never thought about toxic friendships before it was brought up in class. Ghost World definitely portrayed the ideal toxic friendship, where Enid and Rebecca both wanted things to stay the way they have always been in their relationship. I do blame Enid for many things that happened, because it was obvious that she was not at all happy with herself, and that she wanted Rebecca to also be on the same level. For example, in the very beginning of the movie where they were at the dance, and a boy came up to Rebecca to talk to her and he would not even look at Enid, it was obvious that Enid was bothered by this, and pulled Rebecca away to go talk about someone. The toxic friends out there are the ones that do not want to see their friends succeed or to have a significant other, because misery loves company. My mom has always told me that, and I see that to be true more and more as I get older. I know even for me personally, I love when good th

Let's Make a Pact

“Now and Then” was an absolute staple of my girlhood. When it was brought up in class, my mind immediately raced back to the fourth grade and the weekends my best friend and I would spend watching the movie during sleepovers at her house. I specifically remember enjoying the thrill of watching something my mother wouldn’t have allowed in my own house (swearing! nudity! sex talk! never!). Needless to say, I was a bit of a Chrissy back in those days. Watching the movie this weekend helped me to appreciate the movie in an entirely new light, however, and fall even deeper in love with the story than I was before. One recurring theme that I first began to notice during this watching was the adamant declaration of girlhood by the four young women. First reasserted by Chrissy in the restaurant when their waitress called them boys, and later by Roberta when she was told that girls couldn’t play softball, this insistence on being called “girls” was important in constructing the many different

"Some people are ok, mostly I just feel like poisoning everybody"

I've seen a few films recently that deal with a central issue, the toxic friendship. I never realized how prevalent this topic is in films for teenage girls! Soemtime it is blatant and outright, like Thirteen and Mouth to Mouthand, others its a little more underlying, like in Ghost World and Poison Ivy. The film i most recently watched was Ghost World, it has all the components of a teen angst film, the two friends who exude confidence and edge but really are dealing with their own insecurities and cut people down constantly to build themselves up. They are best friends and always seen around with each other (kind of like a modern day Romy and Michelle) and doing something different. I enjoyed that aspect of the film, Enid had her own individual style and both of them did not want to follow the status quo. At the same time these girls are living as a duo, and even when one doubts the others idea (like pranking Steve Buscemi) they wind up doing it anyways. Sometimes it is even harde

Now and Then + Waffles = Fun

Michelle, Jaime and I watched Now and Then this morning (and ate a lot of waffles and doughnut holes, which were delicious by the way) and I realized something; I love being a girl. The movie is a little frivolous, but so is eating waffles and doughnut holes with girlfriends on a Sunday morning. And I know, I know, I have mentioned the waffles four times already; but I love food…and friends. In YWLP, we always have food, because we know that food helps bond people together, and helps us to feel like family. Nina, the head facilitator, says, “What do families do? They eat together. YWLP is like a family, so therefore, we must eat.” And although it’s a little bit of justification to eat cookies and brownies, it is also very valid. I think that movies function in the same way. It is easier to start friendships and relationships with the question, “Want to come over and watch a movie?,” than it is with, “Want to come over and risk awkward silences?” Movies offer themselves as a catalyst

Virgin Suicides

So much of a girl’s life revolves around, and is dictated by gossip…which is a funny thing, considering that gossip depends on trusting your innately shaky source. The way that one will react to another person can easily be changed because of gossip, and can even make one’s own memories fuzzy because of the strong influence of what is supposed to be believed. And it’s not just a girl thing. Men and boys do it. I do it. Every single adult I know does it. Huuptickers probably do it too. It’s like this weirdly all encompassing vacuum that can spread to any aspect of your life, whether it be the color of your fashion top or if your grandma’s sick again. But gossip is what makes The Virgin Suicides such an intriguing film because the scope of the main characters (The Lisbon daughters), is solely portrayed through the direct experiences, memories and of course spread of word from a group of boys who attempt to demystify their tragic deaths. A clear example of this is at

It's code

KIDS made me contemplate all of the verbal and physical 'code' that we take as consensus. In the first scene the girl asks 'do you care about me?', the guy says yes, and that serves as code for 'it's cool to fuck now.' I always pay attention to who*m I'm sympathizing with in a movie because i know that our life experiences shape our experience of a film. I have a hunch that a lot of boy and man-identifying folks are able to watch KIDS and sympathize with the boys and men in the film. For me, sympathizing with a character is not only rooting for that character, but reacting emotionally and mentally with the character to what's going on the situation. When the kids go swimming, I felt like I knew exactly what the girls were going through when they take off their clothes. Eighth grade graduation pool party flashback. Flattered but vulnerable, hot but weak. When the girls were sitting around talking about sex, i felt like i could be there in the room a

Identities and Toxic Friendships

Watching the clip of Ghost World in class, I was confronted with all the mixed feelings about toxic friendships that I’ve had, but not taken much time to flesh out. So I decided to watch it again. Ghost World was one of my favorite movies in high school, and I still think it’s great, but, for me, it’s inextricably tangled with thoughts of my own toxic friendship. The film directly addresses issues of identity formation and the influence and importance of a friend’s acceptance in close relationships between girls. The scene that first caught my attention was the after-prom party. Todd asks Becky where she plans to go to college, and Enid answers that they have “other plans.” She steers Becky away before she is given a chance to respond, redirecting her attention to something that they can bond over. Enid is repeatedly inconsiderate toward Rebecca, ignoring her feelings and wishes. Becky is committed to living out their dream of having an apartment together, while Enid is more interested

GIRLS

After debating for a long while about what movie to watch, both Brittany and I found that "The Virgin Suicides" worked best for this assignment; working towards the understanding of girls, sexuality and self discovery. The movie discussed girls as a nearly separate entity, narrated by young boys who were attempting to describe the girls' elusiveness several times throughout. The boys constantly referred back to wanting to "put together the pieces" and figure out more about their secret lives. In the mean time, the girls were drawing and reading, attending school, bored in class, learning more about their natural desires. There was really nothing elusive about them at all. This didn't stop their search; somehow collecting diaries, lipsticks, letters and anything more that would allow them to understand, the boys closely observed these distant fixtures who only lived across the street. The girls were trapped by a conservative, religious household which

I don't want kids like KIDS

This movie stressed me out, there was so much unconsensual sexual acts. If consensus WAS asked, the answer was no and the boy did whatever he wanted to anyway. The drugs being forced into the girls mouth at the club, the girl getting kissed in the pool when she said she didn't want to be kissed... This movie is so crazy because kids out there really are running around like this without guidance or positive role-models. Education, ESPECIALLY pertaining to sex and HIV/AIDS is so far lacking that these kids put themselves in very dangerous situations. Even if the girl (like the one in the beginning) is living with her parents and in a "safe" family environment, the boy telling her that he cares about her and that she is beautiful is enough for her to "want to please him" by "letting him make her happy." In middle school, there was definitely talk about giving a guy head, but the environment was no where near as hostile as this! The younger boys are pr

“Go away! And don't come back for five to seven days!”

I think My Girl is a great example of girls growing up and the struggles they face. Even though the film came out in 1991 and took place in the summer of 1972 it still seems relevant to young girls today. Now yes I know it may not be as dramatic as other teen movies with drugs and sex but that’s why I can identify with it… Vada freaked out with she began her period and did not know what it was. When I started my period I knew what it was but freaked out cause I was home alone with my brother with no pads and could not get in contact with my mom. Vada watched Shelly as she was putting on make-up and even though she did not understand the point of wear make-up she still allowed Shelly to put some on her. Young girls do not need make-up (or any women in general) but still wear it because they think that’s the norm and they have to look that way. Having a crush on a teacher…come-on who has not? There were still some problems Vada had to deal with... Dealing with the fact that her mother di

Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants-real life experiences

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants is such a great movie and it leaves you feeling good about being a girl. I really like how it portrays girls from different backgrounds, and girls with different interests who all manage to support each other. Bridget is really into sports, Lena enjoys art, Tibby does film projects and Carmen likes theater. Their friendship is also really healthy; I don’t feel like its one of those toxic friendships we discussed in class. The girls all have their own agendas so they represent themselves as individuals, but their individuality is accepted in the group. I think it's a really good message to send out to girls that watch the movie. My favorite part of the movie is the idea of the traveling pants themselves. It reminds me of the "bathroom stall" where girls can have a world all their own. To me, it also seems like a dairy, but instead of young girls writing to themselves and being silenced to a book they learn to share their trials

Film Viewing: Juno

I watched the movie Juno for this weeks assignment. Girlhood was represented a little bit different in this film compared to other “girl” movies but was definitely still there. I thought Juno was an awesome 16 year old girl. She had such a strong personality and self-confidence about her that you do not see in most girls her age. She was not afraid to be herself, say what she was thinking or even dress however she wanted. I think a majority of girls her age would not have reacted the same way if they were in her situation. When she found out she was pregnant she did not show that much emotion about it. One part about it that seemed to be most true was Juno calling her friend to tell her about it. It seems like girls that age typically have that one friend they turn to for everything, and her friend stuck with her no matter what. She offered to make the call to the abortion clinic, and stood by her through the whole process including the doctor appointments. I like how this movi

Now and Then: Young Girls, Sexuality & Agency

I had watched the film Now and Then several times as a girl, but didn't remember a lot about it, so decided that viewing it again would be useful, especially analyzing it through a Girls Studies framework. One aspect of the film that stood out to me in my memory of it and then again upon my recent viewing of it was the character of Chrissy's exposure to and reactions to sexuality. She is a very sheltered girl who doesn't know much about her own body, boys' bodies or sexuality, partially as a result of the way in which her mom approaches these topics with her. In the essay "Shifting Desires," Burns and Torre discuss how young girls are taught to fear sexuality as dangerous. They also discuss how girls' sexualities take a back seat to everything else in their lives as a result of the way their sexuality is addressed. Chrissy definitely doesn't have a developing sense of agency over her sexuality and is very uncomfortable with anything having to do w

"Now and Then" not so interesting.

A very long time ago, I watched "Now and Then". Although, I could not remember anything about the movie, I just knew that I once loved it. When my husband and I went to check it out from Blockbuster, the woman behind the counter rushed over to grab it for me. She said, “I have watched this movie so many times, I knew exactly where it was.” The woman next to her nodded in agreement. "Now and Then" it is, I said to myself. Although I once loved this movie as a girl, I quickly grew bored of it this time around. I never really tried to fit in, and I always found the things boys did so much more interesting. I think many times when women watch movies about other girls or women, they want to be able to identify with a character. I could not do this with "Now and Then", so maybe that is why I did not enjoy it. Although I found the close relationship the girls had with one another wonderful, I could not relate to that either. I had maybe a couple girl friends in

then and now

“Now and Then” hop scotches back and forth from the “now” (early nineties) to the “then” (nostalgic summer of 1970) between the lives of four girls whose bonds represent and inspire a girlhood that spans not only time but their own individual metamorphosis.   The film follows the coming of age of these 12 year old girls who do a lot of growing up during the summer of 1970 as they set out to discover independence within themselves and end up finding independence from each other.   I fondly remember getting together with my best girl friends when I was in middle school to watch this film nearly religiously.   We would all align ourselves with the character whose traits we felt we most embodied and pretended to live that summer, to connect as they connected. Personally, I was always torn between being more like Sam, the offbeat analytic sci-fi writer and Roberta, the take-no-shit tomboy with scrapes on her knees.   Voyeuristic?   Most definitely.   Nevertheless, it was uplifting to re-w

Kids need condoms!

The other night I watched the movie Kids with my boyfriend. It definitely wasn’t what I was expecting and I was so shocked it made me kind of sick. It’s safe to say we were not interested in touching each other after watching, it really degraded sex for me. The way the main character talked about fucking girls disgusted me. It’s hard to believe guys really talk about sex and women like that. It seemed obvious to me that those girls were forced into sex and were not enjoying it yet he told his friend how they were so into it. My boyfriend really had a hard time thinking this movie was close to reality, so I’m glad he doesn’t know any guys like this, but I had to explain to him the realities of how some men treat women. The ending was really sad, even though I knew he had HIV I was shocked for the girl who got tested and found out after one time having sex she had contracted the HIV virus. Watching her cry about how to tell her mom and her little brother was hard, then when she went to

When the heck did wearing a SIZE 0 make someone "full-figured"?

This story was on the front page of yahoo.com today. How unbelievable and wrong! Geez, if a size 0 is big, what does that make me? I can't even imagine what little girls reading this article will think. How very sad.... When Eva Longoria Parker put on a few pounds over the summer for her role as Gabrielle on "Desperate Housewives," everyone jumped to the conclusion that the actress was pregnant. In the November issue of Allure , Eva sets the record straight about her recent weight gain, as well as the rumors surrounding her marriage to NBA star Tony Parker. [ See Pics From Eva's Allure Photo Shoot ] On her fuller figure :"I stopped working out and gained about seven pounds over the summer, which is a lot for a small person. Every magazine is tearing me apart ... I never went up a size. I just got rounder. I'm still a size 0 . On relationship rumors:"I don't let those magazines and articles define who I am. I know I'm not pregnant. I know Tony and

School and Friendships

So I'm posting a blog for Wednesday nights class because I missed it due to a horribly sick week, wash your hands and use plenty of hand sanitizer ladies!!! High school prom was one of the things I thought about when going to high school, I thought it was magical and you would have the perfect date and find the perfect dress and if you were lucky be prom queen! Turns out, I didn’t even go to prom, by the time I got to my senior year I thought it was so cliché and since we had homecoming every year which I thought was pretty bring, it didn’t seem very new to me. I feel like a lot of my friends felt the same way even though some of them went. I worried that I would regret this decision, but I never did. I never went to prom and I turned out fine. It seems so outrageous to me the amount of money people spend to go to prom. I remember girls spending hundreds of dollars on dresses, wearing things I thought were too mature for high school girls to be wearing. One of the times I went

13 in CA

I had to blog about yesterday's screening in class of Thirteen .  I remember seeing the cover for this film at Blockbuster, and renting it in secret.  I had never before seen a film that captured the raw and rivetting growing up of girls.  Being exposed to Now & Then, I thought it was all about sisterhood and seances.  While it may be about those elements as well, the more twisted, realistic, and complex situations dealt with by the coming of age girls in this film was far more eye-opening. Director Catherine Hardwicke’s delivery of Nikki Reed’s rigid and all too real adjustment to her teenage years exposes sensitive subject matter in a Neo-Realistic fashion.   Written pre-dominantly by Reed, she also stars in the film as the girl who was responsible for spiraling her own (real) life out of control, school “hottie”: Evie Zamora.   The autobiographical documentary creates an edgy perspective of what it meant to be thirteen years old in California in the late 90’s.   It follo

Campus Trash

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Some of this is directly related to girls and our course material and some of it really isn't, but I knew that this was something that you all would care about and be as outraged over as me. I apologize if it seems like I'm spamming the blog. I think you all have amazing feminist analysis and this is relevant to our campus, so I thought of you all! So, I don't know how many of you have seen the magazine Campus Talk all around campus. I never really looked too closely at it until recently. I honestly probably thought it was the same magazine as Axis or whatever -- sexy blond women on the cover, coverage of terrible bands...whatever. But I walked past the stands recently and saw the following headline: TIGHTEN THE LEASH! How 2 Train Your Girlfriend Umm? So I just walked past, not wanting to even bother looking closer. I was sure that the editor/writer thought they were brilliantly funny and clever and it wasn't the first time I'd seen an offensive headline. Well, tu

You're going to .... frag me?

about-face.org is a GREAT site, I love seeing criticism of media and mainstream advertising because it's so important for girls to see these images and say "oh, hell no." Kathyrn and I can definitely use this as a resource for our zine-making workshop :) :) (two smileys = more excited, as opposed to only one) "computer gaming as a whole seems to be a male-dominated domain" and I agree. Here's a popular online gaming site for girls- missbimbo.com!! "This site, which many pre-teen girls and older girls have visited, is a cluster of every insecurity that any girl may endure or already have. Well, we played this game so you don't have to: You're first given an ideal height and weight to maintain. You are given the option to achieve your 'goals.' My bimbo's goal just so happened to be to change her 'drab' hairstyle and become a "popular" blonde with pigtails! If I achieve these 'goals,' I will soon gain VIP ac

Cybergrrrls: Exploring The Next Frontier

I can clearly remember the first time I stumbled across my now 14-year-old sister’s homepage. Being the over-protective sister that I am, I was at first upset that she had been posting information over the Internet (and that she had her own computer in her room way before I was allowed to have one!), but after looking over her page, I was absolutely in awe of her work. Unknown to the rest of her family, she had taught herself Photoshop, and was creating and posting digital images and collages of her favorite bands, TV shows, and actors. Her knowledge of digital media and graphic design was nothing short of outstanding, especially to someone like me who has absolutely no idea how to work outside of Microsoft Paint. She had enabled a guestbook, much like the “serial community” discussed in “All About the Girl,” where people were leaving her comments of praise, as well as suggestions and tips on how to improve on her next designs (Reid-Walsh, Mitchell 179). As this was my first real intro

A room of one's own = agency

The article we read this week in All About the Girl titled “Girls’ Web Sites: A Virtual ‘Room of One’s Own’?” brought up many good reasons behind girls creating their own web pages. I definitely agree that for girls having a web page is a way to explore her own independence, authority, and agency. This virtual space is a place where she is in charge, not her parents, teacher, or peers. It is a way for her to cultivate and create her own creativity and it is used as an outlet for any passions or emotions she otherwise may not be allowed to express. It is a way for girls to communicate and socialize outside of school. This is especially important if the girl does not have many people at school, home, or other out of school activities to be friendly with. This may be relevant to children who are home schooled or have social anxiety disorders. These children who do not socialize much outside of a virtual space have a place where they can make friends and communicate about their hobbies and

Subvertising

I could definitely relate to this week's readings because the internet and technology have long been something that I enjoy. I remember how excited I was to make my first website. However, my experience was a little different. I didn't make it so that I could have my own "room"; it wasn't sparkly or pink or anything. The sole purpose of my site was to keep my family updated and connected with each other. That, in a nutshell, is what I like most about the internet - you can connect with people, even those you've never met. That's something that I think is really useful in third wave feminism, especially because we're fighting for sisterhood on a global level. What I found most interesting in the readings was being able to see how different cultures utilize technology. For example, we have "Girls in Ghana Get Computerized" which is super awesome. However, we also have missbimbo.com (which is featured on about-face.org which was mentioned on t