What is Girls Studies? Why Girls Studies?

Girls' Studies. From what I have read so far, I see that the material we will be reading, viewing, and discussing is endlessly fascinating, being that I am 21 and successfully out of my “adolescence.” It seems unfortunate that this information and understanding towards matters of girlhood register with us in such a sophisticated way only now that we have passed though the time which we are questioning and examining. One crucial element when desiring to gain insight and awareness towards any group of people, whether the grouping is determined by anatomy or culture, is that assumptions and/or judgments based on personal experience do not become the guiding force. Already, in the one of the posts, girlhood is described as the time when burping and the wearing boy’s clothing must subside. For me, as an individual, this was not the case. I was the girl who refused to wear anything but dresses from the age of three, and who hid in a bathroom stall at the pool when my parents signed me up for swim team (the “cleanest” sport they could find for me). With the encouragement from other parents at my elementary school, my parents scrambled to find a sport for me; ballet just wasn’t cutting it anymore. And the worst part is; it wasn’t only the parents who deemed my preferences as less valuable than soccer, softball, or tennis. Girls in my class told me that ballet “is for sissy’s,” or, “tutus are stupid…what are you, a princess?” But still, I remember crying when my mom told me that I was trading in my leotard for a one-piece black Speedo. Her explanation, which I remember very dearly, was expressed in a tone so conflicted, so unsure, while she told me that it is good to try new things; that swim team was less about costume and more about athleticism. She seemed at odds with her decision to allow the knowledge of others to influence my activities, instead of her knowledge of me. I struggled to understand why wanting to wear a costume was wrong as I struggled with the swim team, and had to be bribed throughout the entire season. My mom couldn't handle it anymore, and it was the best day of my entire life when she announced I could switch back to ballet the following year.

And here is the mistake: in attempting to prevent me from feeling badly about being a girl…I felt badly about being a girl.

In order to understand each other as we are now, and as we were then, we must come with open minds and an appreciation for difference. There is no right or wrong way to be as a human, just as there is no right or wrong way to be as a woman. We have to stop trying so hard to fit ourselves into a box, and practice acceptance and individuality. These problems are not limited to girls; there are little boys who want to be a butterfly for Halloween just as there are little girls who want to be a Power Ranger (on a side note…do Power Rangers even exist anymore?) I reacted very strongly against the word “feminism” for a long time, mainly because of how its twisted evil twin, “misunderstood feminism,” made me feel as a young girl. Let there be no confusion; girls should be encouraged to be who they are...and if that involves soccer and flag football, then I am eternally grateful to the foremothers of feminism for making that okay. But we must be cautious to not let that be the only option in a feminist world. We all but throw a parade for a man if he chooses a life as a stay-at-home dad, but when a woman does it, she is selling herself short. When a man desires marriage, we swoon; when a woman dreams of a wedding, she is labeled as pathetic. I pray that as I learn more, I find that the principles which lead to attitudes such as these are not found in the core of feminism. I hope to gain a better understanding of the feminist ideology from this class, and a better understanding of the people who dedicate their belief systems to it. However, I am confident in who I am, and if the principles of feminism demand and/or require something different than who that is, then I can not be in support of it on a personal level. Already, I feel slightly threatened by All About the Girl; I feel as though sympathizing and identifying with Bridget Jones is going to put me at odds with the ideas in this book. That being said, I am hoping that the material we cover throughout the course will allow me to better understand myself, the girls in YWLP, and women as we function and grow within our culture.

Love demands acceptance, and acceptance breeds love; that I believe. And so although I am coming to this class with little to no formal knowledge of feminism and its applications towards understanding girlhood, I hope to find that we maneuver through it together, and without predetermined ideas of what each other is capable of thinking.

Love,
Em[ily]